Junuary

I hear a lot of complaints about the weather this time of year.  I don't know if it's because I'm from here....or because I just love gray days.....but I have no complaints about June in the Northwest....part of my childhood memories are the last few weeks of school being beautiful and then right after we get out of school it rains....it rains and rains and rains until well after the 4th of July....this is the weather Northwesterners are famous for....sweaters, shorts, sandals and socks....I love having the windows open and hearing the rain hit the bushes outside my window.  I even like being freezing cold on the 4th of July as we watch the fireworks.

Today was no exception....I'm working early this week and so I came home....complained sufficiently about my job and then asked Gordon if he wanted to go out and work in the garden with me....the sun had come out.  So we went out and immediately we were in a downpour....but the beautiful part of it was, was that the sky was kind of pink....and so in our T-Shirts we got the hay for the girls who were hunkered down in their house, and then mucked....with the sound of the rain hitting the roof.....tippity tapping....it was warm still and I liked the cold rain on my arms.  

I like the way things hurt your fingers when they're wet...and I was trying to unscrew the hose and I couldn't because it was slick and it made my fingers sting.  I like the feeling of being in a bit of a hurry when it rains because you want to go inside and dry off....I'm not going to lie, I like the smell of wet dogs on a day like today.  I like the sound of the rain dripping off full leaves on the trees and the way the garden sparkles when it rains.  

August and September will be here soon....the sun and warmth will be here.....I will cover my tomatoes with garbage bags so they can get warm enough to make some beautiful tomatoes.....I like this time of year....I like the feel of soggy flip flops and the way they slide on the grass in the rain.  I wouldn't trade this area for anything. 

And so you haters....when you're complaining about the weather and the cold and the wind....remember this is what makes our area so green.....it gives us blackberries and lettuce and peas and happy things.....this area  is gorgeous and we are blessed.

Saturday

Today was a beautiful day.  I had a plan to get together with friends tonight and wanted to make a avocado, goat cheese, shrimp and cilantro dip to bring.  It's one of the first things I made for Gordon when we first started dating.  And so....Gordon and I went out to breakfast at the Freeland Cafe.  It's a typical greasy spoon that's in the heart of our little town.  After breakfast we headed to the Bayview Market.  It's the local Farmer's Market by our house.  Locals talk about it being a bit touristy.  I think to myself that Whidbey Island in Summer is a bit touristy....I both hate the tourists and appreciate what they do for our Island, and for my Husband's business.  And so we went to the market.  But today it didn't feel touristy....the market was filled with the people we know, and it was fun and sweet.  And so we entered....my market basket in hand, ready to make our purchases.
First we stopped by Little Brown Farm's stand to get our chevre for the dip.  Of course this is my favorite stop.  Vicky Brown has taken me under her wing and has shown me what a farmer can do....what passion, compassion and know how brought together can bring around.  It's not an easy life....but I know they sleep well at night knowing that they make amazing cheese....teach amazing things....and their charges could certainly not be more loved or cared for.  Her husband Tom was running the stand....he's the example of what a good husband can to do help a woman find her dream.  As couples we all joke around that they are probably the only couple on the Island cuter than us.  But alas....I digress.
Next to Tree Top Baking for our baguette.  Again....people you know....talking about the joys of living in this community.  We then found a guy selling strawberries....berries that won a blue ribbon at the fair last year.  It was a guy I'd never seen before.  But again....the joy of the Island....we were talking about his strawberries, and he told Gordon, "We live by Adam's grandparents....in the yellow house."  Only in a community like this one can you say that and people know what you're talking about.
Then to Willowood Farm stand where we chatted with the girl about beet greens...I love that I can find joy and get excited about beet greens.  I love that the girl who was working there and I talked about beet greens, and goats, and Vicky Brown's goats....and that she didn't know my girls....but she knew their cousins ....and she loved a place I loved....Little Brown Farm....and she worked for another strong farm woman....who was not a Farmer's Wife....but a wife who is a farmer, Georgie Smith....who is farming on land her grandparents farmed, whose husband supported her dream and her passion...who again cares for her community....another farmer who is my hero.  We bought some scallions for a Cambodian Corn Sauce I'm going to make tomorrow for our dinner.
After that we went to Quail's Run where I talked with the woman about cilantro, and I said that mine wasn't that big....and she talked about how she had picked the cilantro this morning.  I smelled it....we talked about how amazing fresh cilantro was.  I told her that we stand in our garden and pick pieces of our cilantro and eat it and how amazing it is....and how you just can't buy it from the store when you know how good it is when it's fresh.  
And so....my basket was full, as we were leaving there was a person playing guitar with their dog at their feet.  The music made me tear up.  What a companion this musician had in this sweet dog sitting at their feet....what a peaceful wonderful life this dog has where she gets to join her friend and companion wherever they go....she gets to hear her master's music she get to be part of it....I love sweet dogs....I love owners who love them beyond measure.....I love my market....I love my Island.....I tolerate the tourists who drive slow and clog up the ferry.....I love my husband who brought me here....I love the farmers who make this a place where I can know the people who make my food....I love my chef who does amazing things with their food....and I love that I can chat with the farmers and their employees about my garden and my livestock.  And so....this was my Saturday

A Week of Miracles

This has been a treacherous week at work.  I'm exhausted and it's only Tuesday....both nights I've gone home, enjoyed a beer and found myself dreading the week to come.  On top of it, I've felt sick, not sure if it's MS or a cold or just stress.
All this to say I've really struggled to see the beauty around me for the last few weeks.  But some things have happened this week that have caused me to take pause and remember the beautiful blessings of my sweet life.  And now I'm going to share them with you.
On Sunday I got a message from my goat mentor and friend, and she shared an idea with me that I'm not going to share here....but it filled me with excitement, hope, and helped me to remember that I do have talents....and I have some things to share with the world....and although right now I have a 4 hour commute to a soul-killing physically exhausting job (as I described it to the Barista at Starbuck's) some day I may be able to spend more time with my "herd" and feathering the nest I share with my sweet husband.  So....that's something to give me hope....something to help me get me through these rough days.
Yesterday I found out I won a "major award".....it's a silly thing but I guessed how many bubble gums were being held by this giant gorilla....and I won the giant gorilla....but I WON him....I've never won a prize before.  So I was a little excited.  Another thing to be thankful for.
So.....today on the way home I was driving down the road from work.  People were looking at me and I heard a noise so I parked my car and looked on the side of my door.  I didn't think see anything, so I went on my merry way.  I think I drive about 15 miles to the ferry....people kept looking at me and I thought maybe something was going wrong with my car.
So, I got in the ferry line and went to grab my ticket....as I looked on the passenger seat and noticed that the handle to my purse was sitting on the seat....but I didn't see the actual purse....aha!!!  I said to myself.  The purse is what I heard.  So....I walked around to the other side of the car and and low and behold, there was my purse hanging...connected to the door....with a giant hole in it.  So I grabbed my purse and EVERYTHING was in my purse....including a zip drive with my wedding pictures.
I was also the last car on the boat....another miracle.
When I got home, my husband had bought a weed wacker for us.  We've needed a weed wacker, so it was quite a splendiferous gift.  So I wacked some weeds and felt quite proud of my accomplishments....I then brought the chopped weeds to my girls who ate them with gusto.  And as I stood there, watching them eat, playing frisbee with my sweet Charley feeling the wind go through my hair, I smiled at myself and felt overwhelmed with gratitude for my life....the God who brought it all together....and continues to lay a pathway for me to follow.  I will continue to look for the amazing things that come my way....work on the gratitude that I need to learn....and follow my heart....cling to the people who know what they're doing....and see what the next stage brings us.
Thank you God, Goddess, Universe for leading me on this path.  I will continue to learn to quiet down so I can go where I'm supposed to.

This Amazing Man

So...most of the people who read this blog know me....and if you know me the chances are pretty good you know the man who chose me as his wife.  But I just wanted to take a moment to let you know who this amazing man is.
His name is Gordon James Stewart, Jr.  He grew up in Arlington and was raised by Fundamentalist Christians who raised him up to be a good boy, and he was raised up around good food, listening to his dad's preaching.
When I met him he was a chubby kid who hadn't quite found his footing in the world.  He was getting ready to go to Sno-Isle Skills Center where he was going to learn how to be a chef.  When I knew him he was a little shy and just seemed like he needed someone to show him the way.  When I knew him all those years ago we were painting our youth pastor's house and he asked me if I was hungry.  I told him I was...I guess I didn't have a car with me, so he rode his bike down to The Pizza Factory and spent his money to get us both a sandwich.  I remember that moment for 2 reasons.  First of all, I let some kid go downtown and get me a sandwich, and I let him pay.  At that time I think he worked at the hospital in Arlington, I have no doubt he worked harder than I did for his money....and his only means of transportation was said bike...and so after riding the many miles it took him to get to our pastor's house, he rode it down a very steep hill that he would have to ride up again to bring us sandwiches.  The second thing I will always remember is that I ate that whole sandwich.  It was a story I would tell friends to prove how selfish and gluttunous I can be.
And so this shy, strange, chubby kid who said he wanted be a chef stuck with me.  I always wondered how that kid was doing.  That's the nature of his being....he gets in your heart....he is bigger than life....he demands  your attention....he draws you to him.
And so, this kid I knew from my hometown did stuff.  He was given a gift from God that is his way of sharing his soul with the world.  When he cooks for you, it changes you....you discover flavors you never knew existed.  He did what he said he would do, he opened a restaurant.....a place to feed your soul.
What I know about him is that he is a born teacher, a born showman.  I wish I had that kind of passion....that kind of determination....that kind of drive.  I wish I knew, like he does how to have a dream and really make it happen.  I wish I had half his know-how, half his skill, the passion he has in his pinky.
If you have not been, his restaurant is Gordon's on Blueberry Hill.  It's a beautiful place filled with beautiful people and amazing food. www.gordonsonblueberryhill.com is the website.  Come to Freeland, meet my husband and his staff and be blown away.

You Can't Always Get What You Want.....

I got home today after a long day of being short staffed and stressed....of climbing on the bus and hurrying to the ferry.  When I got home and fed my girls, and mucked their house, and then greeted my sweet boys, I looked over my garden and saw how things were growing....including the weeds.

As I poured Sluggo along the perimeter of our garden, the thought was going through my head, "You don't get what you want....you get what you need."  The last couple weeks have been full of looking back.  Last weekend Gordon and I went to Winthrop to celebrate our 1st Anniversary.  While we were there we went on a drive to Okanogon, for no particular reason.  As I saw the sign for Omak I told Gordon that I used to go there for choir tours....he said he had gone too, and we remembered that we had been there together on a choir tour with our church.  It became a mission.

We drove through Omak and reminisced about our particular thoughts and memories.  We went to a church in Riverside where we had sung together  years ago.  That was the choir tour where Gordon had first had a crush on me....it's the time of our lives that the string started to weave our souls together.
I'm also 2 weeks from the 25th anniversary of my graduation from High School.
So, as I was feeding and admiring, I was thinking about how different my life is now from the life I imagined as I was preparing to graduate.....back then I didn't think I would be rich....I had a plan in place to become a Missionary.  I wanted to go to Bible College and learn how to spread the Gospel to Cambodia.  Or I wanted to marry a Pastor.  I knew that I would be in the ministry regardless.
Fast forward 25 years....I'm certainly not rich....I'm not in the ministry.  I'm a childcare worker at a center that cares for homeless and transitional children....it's a job that I love, but honestly sucks my soul dry.  I live on Whidbey Island....and I have goats and dogs....and I'm married to an amazing chef.  It's not the life I envisioned 25 years ago....but it's the life that fits who I've always been.I ...when I was little I loved animals, I adored "Little House on the Prairie" and wanted to teach.
Now I care about kids....my passion is dogs...and now goats....and I adore food and growing it and cooking it and connecting with the people who grow it and cook it.  We have found a beautiful church home just around the corner from our lovely little house on the hill.
And so....I am living the life I imagined as a little girl.....not as an 18 year old going on Choir Tour and getting ready to go to  Bible College.....I wonder if God laughs at the girl I was....or the girl I am....I know he smiles on us both.