The Summer started with me losing my job....the reason why is not important, but I did. That night I went home and drank a bottle of blackberry wine and made caramel corn....I sat next to the dogs I shared with my roommate and I cried....the chocolate lab, Bear, started licking my face and as I cried all I could think was "If I pass out he might eat my face....that would really suck."
One day while I was planting sunflowers for my best friend's bird and he was weed wacking his bird somehow climbed out of the cage we had outside. He was gone.....I knew there had to be a metaphor for life there. Our friendship was changing.....he had a girlfriend.....sometimes you just have to let things go, if they come back it was meant to be....if not....it never was....hmmm
As the Summer progressed, I got to know my best friend's girlfriend better....she lived on Whidbey Island at the time. One night I told her that I had an old friend who had a restaurant on Whidbey Island (I had seen a thing about him posted on Facebook) and she asked me the restaurant, I told her and she said "Oh Gordon's. Gordon is amazing!!!!! He has a partner, but she's not his wife, I think he's single."
And so I spent the summer busying myself with my garden, and learning to make cheese (I thought I might want to take up goat farming), and learning to can and make jam and use all the things I was growing in my bountiful garden. I was baking and cooking more and more, trying out new recipes on my friend and his girl...I even made chicken feet....I bought a cookbook about Northwest cooking from settler times.....it talked about Useless Bay on Whidbey Island.....hmmmm.....Whidbey Island.....I wonder how Gordon is doing....hmmmm.
So I finally got up the nerve to message Gordon....do you really remember me? I would love to meet with you for coffee or something and we could catch up. I was going through a very lost time in my heart if I want to be honest with myself.....I think I wanted to know what it was like to live the life you said you would....I wanted to meet this kid Gordon I knew.....I wanted to connect to something.
So we set up a date.....I had lunch with one of my oldest friends and I told her about the "date"....she said, Yeah....I never saw you having a goat farm on the Jordan Road....Whidbey Island though....I could see that.
Gordon and I talked a few days before the date....I felt like a kid....he sounded just the same.....he joked about vodka so I knew he drank, and that made me happy.....I was nervous.
Finally the day came....we met....I drove on the ferry with my heart in my throat....I knew things were going to change. And as I drove up the Island I thought and thought.....my hair was curly, I wore my prettiest dress.....and I found the place....and he came out....that little kid I knew in the 80's had grown up....his eyes sparkled....I couldn't believe it.
The day flew by....we went to Double Bluff and talked and talked.....when it was time to leave I sat on the ferry and called him again. I knew I was in love....I liked who Gordon had become....I liked who I was when I was with him.
The rest of the Summer was spent in a strange courtship....I didn't want to be too needy....but he didn't really make any moves....I was confused.....and finally one day I invited myself over to "spend the night" and I knew....I knew this was real.
I spend a lot of time on this blog talking about how my dreams have come true with this amazing man.....when I look back at that Summer I think of how everything happened for a reason. Had I been working I couldn't have focused on Gordon or spent as much time with him.....that was the summer I learned to make cheese and cook better, and I think Gordon thought those skills were kind of sexy.....he even introduced me to "Little Brown Farm" chevre....and I made stuff for him with it....another amazing connection that changed my life forever.
I think the summer of '10 will always be one of my favorite....it was a summer of dogs, gardening, blackberries, cheese, and a chef who carried a bucket to gather herbs at his restaurant.
So....if you think you shouldn't believe in Fairy Tales, or if you think things are hard or scary or sad, just know that there's hope. With every loss there's a gain....and when your bird flies away maybe it was meant to be and the flowers you planted for him are still beautiful and make you happy.
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